


missing chapters of "the dark mission"

by Rouhn



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Captain Swan - Freeform, Jolly Roger - Freeform, Mutiny, Smut, enchanted forest, missing chapters, mission
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-09-21 13:32:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9551198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rouhn/pseuds/Rouhn
Summary: I have so many ideas for my story "the dark mission" - this is a collection of these missing chapters which do not fit into the big story > eventual some chapters are a bit confusing first but everything will be clear at the end > you can also send me a request if you want to read something specific -  also find me on TUMBLR: Rouhn





	1. why Snow White hid the letters

**Author's Note:**

> here it is the first missing chapter - please not that these chapters can be shorter than regular ones, I hope you will enjoy them as much as I enjoyed writing them

Charming slammed the door, he was furious. "Snow, I can't believe you hid the letters from me. **YOU!** " "Charming!", she warned him, "you are waking Neal." He looked at the baby bed and lowered his voice. 

  


"Why, tell me why you kept this from me. Aren't **YOU** the one who always tell us not to have any secrets?" Snow nodded and sat down quietly. "So then why did you keep this from me?" He sat down next to her and took her hand in his own. 

  


"David, I also received the letters just some days ago." "But they are dated back until some days after the departure."

  


"Yes, but Emma never wrote directly at us. You once taught her this, remember?"

  


He sighed and got up. "From whom did you get the letters?"

  


"Belle." Charming's eyes widened.

  


"But she wasn't here couple of months."

  


"yes, but Emma didn't know that and that's why I just received the letters."

  


"Nevertheless, it's so unlike you not sharing things with me." She handed him the letters. He took the them and got up. 

  


"Read them."

  


"Yes, I will."

  


They fell into a uncomfortable silence. "Do you think it was a mistake sending them on that mission?", Snow broke the silence. Charming turned and frowned. 

  


"Are you questioning our decision?" Snow raised and walked to him. "I...no...David...", she sighed again, "I know it was wrong to keep this hidden from you but maybe you will understand when you read them."

  


David looked at the letters. It were about seven. He opened the first one reading it quietly. He frowned. 

  


"She felt lonely." Snow nodded. 

  


"She felt left out. I never thought Hook would make her feel like that." 

  


"But we heard why today." 

  


"She didn't mention it in her letters at all." 

  


"She hardly mentions anything. It's mostly about her feelings." 

  


Charming was still angry with his wife but he came to her and wrapped his arms around her. 

  


"Let's move this to bed. Will be much more comfortable." Snow White nodded and broke the hug to go and undress herself.

  


"She what?", David yelled making Snow White jump. 

  


"David?" 

  


"Here, the letter says she accepted his proposal?! He had to ask **me** first. How dare him not asking me first to marry my only daughter?"

  


Snow White smiled and stepped closer. "David, you and me know it was just a matter of time." 

  


"Nevertheless, he should have asked me first. I'm not only his king or Emma's father - I'm his mate." 

  


He pouted and started to undress himself, never leaving the eyes of another letter. 

  


"You should read them in the correct order, David."

  


"Mhm...Why was Densworth giving her such a hard time?", he asked, up buttoning his sleep wear.

  


"I don't know. I can't remember him being so overprotective and correctly. I really thought it was a good thing sending him on this mission with her."

  


Charming climbed into the bed. "What do the other letters say?", he asked slowly. 

  


"Ella and Thomas' having another baby, Eric and Ariel's big fight..." 

  


"We knew about that. Ariel was here a couple of weeks." 

  


"Right, but Emma didn't know we already knew", Snow shook her head smiling and went on. "I think Emma just needed someone to talk about her feelings when she wasn't able to talk to Killian. I also think she tried to figure out some things for herself.

  


Charming lowered another piece of paper. "She really questioned her decision coming to the Enchanted Forest?" He sighed and looked at his wife. "Was it egoistic from us asking her to come with us? We lost so many moments with her. I just thought we could be together. At least in the same realm. I mean, was it too much to ask for?"

  


Snow shook her head. "No it wasn't. David, it was her decision, she is a grown up woman, she knew what she signed for.“

  


„But what if she only wanted to make us happy. You, me, Henry, Hook? You know she always wants to make everyone happy. She had to bring us all our happy ending, but what if this never should be her happy ending?”

  


“David, stop it.” 

  


“Why? Why should I, have you...have you read this?”, he held up another letter, “she doesn't say it directly, but she blames us, blames me. For this...” He tapped the paper, looking at his wife hurt.

  


She cupped his face, locking eyes with him. “You know your daughter; you know that it is hard for her to open up and these letters just show us how far she has come. She trusts us with her feelings, feelings she had during a journey we weren't with her. We just know bits and pieces. Maybe writing to us kept her sane?! I remember being with the dwarfs. Of course I could have talked to them but never about them; my feelings were locked deep down inside me. I had to hide so many years; I hadn't anyone to trust or talk to a long time. The creatures of the wood became my friends, but Emma had nobody to talk to. Even in port she always was beware to behave like a real princess. Representing our kingdom was important for her...”

  


“But only, because of me. She didn't want it. Not a single moment she wanted to be Crown Princess Emma of Misthaven on this mission. She only wanted to be Emma; Killian's partner or fiancé or whatever they were...are...whatever. She did this for **me**. To make **me** happy. **I** sent her on that mission; **I** decided she had to take Densworth with her. **I** chose which naval officer should join her. **I** nearly killed her, at least _twice_. **I** am responsible for Killian's death.”

  


“David! Charming calm down, breath”, his wife tried to sooth him, “we don't even know if Killian is dead and Emma is alive. Don't blame yourself! Let's go to bed and listen to everything Emma is telling us tomorrow. I think it is important that we are there for her, that we show her that we respect her decisions.”

  


“Which we do **not** completely.”

  


“No, but now we have to be her parents. She needs us. I don't want to judge about anything before we know the whole story. Let's go to bed now, it's late and tomorrow will be a long day.”

  


“Right. I'll finish the letters and join you in a minute.”

  


“Take your time. And don't forget, we don't know the whole picture. I love you, David.”

  


“I love you too. Sleep well, Snow.”

  


“Good night.”


	2. stew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> as we all know from season 2 - Emma isn't fond of the cuisine of the Enchanted Forest > you need another proof? read on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it doesn't take place in a specific period of time in the story; it's just something which popped up in my head and I really needed to get out to move on with other stuff.

"What's that?", Emma wrinkled her nose in disgust. She had never seen food looking like that. She knew that the food in the Enchanted Forest was not like the one back in the modern world, but this – this was something else.

Killian looked at her amused. "Try it", he said and stuffed a spoon full of the stew in his mouth. Emma twisted her mouth. "How can you...", she lowered her voice, "how can you eat that? It looks like someone has already eaten it."

Killian bursted into laughter. "It may not look as delicious as food in a fancy restaurant in your realm, but I can assure you it is worth a try." With this words another spoon wandered into his mouth.

Emma looked around. Everyone at the table ate, talked and enjoyed the food. He watched Mr. Baskin stuffing so much stew in his mouth that most of it got caught in his beard. Emma looked away hastily. Not a single man at the table refused the brown-greenish-stew. It didn't  **smell**  that bad, but it looked awful. She dipped the spoon into it and lifted the spoon then, watching the stew dripping back into the bowl. Emma shook her head and pushed the bowl aside, taking a slice of bread instead.

"Swan, you need to eat. You cannot only eat bread. We will be at sea at last a week and you won't get something as good and heathy and substantial as this."

Emma shivered. "What about the delicious corned beef we always have on board?"

"Not this time. Not every port has it and I'm afraid we are in one of these ports."  _Hmpf._ Emma was disappointed and annoyed. "Come on, Emma, try it. Please. It is really good. Trust me."

She shook her head again. "I can't, Killian. I can't. It's... it looks disgusting." Killian sighed and took her bowl of stew. Within minutes he emptied it. Fully sated he sat back and patted his stomach.

"Delicious as always, Captain", Smee suddenly yelled and stuffed his last spoon full of stew in his mouth. "Aye", several men agreed and raised their glasses. Emma chewed her bread and watched the scene irritated.

"Some time you  **need**  to tell me the secret ingredient", Huffington, the cook, told Killian raising his glass too.

"You and I know that will never happen, Huff", Killian said smiling, raising his glass aswell.

"That was the famous Captain's stew?", Commander Haddock asked suddenly, joining the conversation. Smee nodded, unable to speak with his mouth full. Emma listened in shock. She looked at Haddock, Smee and at Killian. "Delicious, Captain. One of the best stews I've ever tasted", Commander Haddock said with a huge, stated grin on his face.

Emma went white. All men of the crew raised their glasses and cheered at Killian in unison. Killian shook his head and thanked them smiling. "Just the best for my crew", he said and sipped at his drink, he turned his head and smiled at Emma sadly. "Or not", he added quietly and drowned the rest of his drink.

"Killian...", she started, extremely regretting her decision not even tasting the stew. She felt awful, she felt bad, horrible to be specific. She not only refused to try it, she had also told him that it looked disgusting, uneatable. What a horrible person she was.

"It's alright, love", he said and took her hand, exactly knowing what she was thinking. Emma blushed and looked down. She thought about their time back in her realm. He always tried what she cooked or ordered, no matter if he knew what it was or not. Not once he declined her food. Not once he questioned her recommendation. He trusted her completely. With everything. She felt horrible.

When Emma came to the cabin at night, a box laid on their cod.

**Mr. Baskin was able to find some of your beloved corned beef. Eat something. You must be starving. I'll join you later – need to be sure the ship leaves the harbour safe. Love, Killian**

Now Emma felt even more horrible. She decided to try everything from now on, to never question Killian's recommendation again.

And she apologised nearly the whole night, enjoying every treat he offered her...


	3. swim (short)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma is going for a swim - this time alone

"Emma! Bloody hell!" Killian's eyes widened. Densworth who was enjoying an apple on deck nearly chocked. Several men whistled but stopped immediately when Killian barked at them. Lieutenant Ivory shook his jacket off his shoulders and placed it on hers.

Emma turned and removed the jacket annoyed. "Your Highness", the naval officer started quite embarrassed but was cut off by Emma's voice.

"It's way too hot today. I'm going for a swim." Densworth rushed towards her and grabbed her upper arms. "Your Highness, cover yourself. That's not a suitable swimming suit."

Killian wasn't sure if he should be angry with her, yell at her or if he should enjoy the scenario and be amused. His brazen, bold Swan, driving the over correctly Densworth mad.

She stood right in front of the man, on deck of the Jolly Roger. Every eye on her. He should be more than jealous but the only thing he felt was pride and amusement.

They anchored in a bay of an uninhabited island. There were just them here. A ship full of more or less trustworthy sailors. All of them knew that Emma was a beautiful lass, now they could see without seeing too much.

Of course his beloved, stunning, fearless Swan has brought one of her so-called bikinis with her. A red one, showing off her creamy white skin, her long milky legs, her toned arms and stomach.

He watched her stepping closer. His eyes flicking between her face, cleavage, and stomach. "Like what you see, Captain?", she asked and narrowed her eyes seductively.

He smiled at her and placed his hook on her waist. "Always. But you know you are giving my men quite a show?" She shook her head. "That was never my intention. I just wanted to go for a swim. Ain't you hot in all this leather?"

"I'm used to it. I wear the leather all the time." Emma smiled.

"Will you join me?"

"I wish I could. But if I join you now I'm not sure I can hold myself back. And you nearly naked is the only show I wanna give my men, we making out or more would be too much."

Emma blushed and kissed him hard. "Later?", she asked with big eyes.

He nodded and bent down. „I will ravish you and have my wicked way with you. You teasing me like this in front of all my men... not fair...", he whispered in her ear. Emma shivered but smiled. She kissed him again and turned.

The next moment she jumped into the crystal clear water. Several men whistled again this time including Killian. He hasn't thought about her jumping from the ship. He went to the railing and watched her coming back to the surface.

"Are you insane, Emma?" She giggled and dove again. He just shook his head and went to the hem.

"Show is over, back to your duties. Leave her alone", he yelled.

"Captain, you cannot leave her alone in the water. It's dangerous", Densworth said looking helpless and worried.

"Keep calm. Emma can handle herself."

"But she isn't aware of this realm. The dangers, everything." Killian sighed. He knew he was right but he also knew that Emma hated it to be babied all the time. She was a grown up after all.

He decided to give her about twenty minutes then he would look after her.

He watched his crew while waiting, every now and then a man searched the water. When the sailor was smiling he knew that Emma had been spotted and was alright. The moment he wanted to go to the railing to call her back, he heard the lookout.

"Ship ahhhhoy!", he shouted suddenly. Everyone turned it's head. "Bloody hell!" Killian rushed towards the railing, but Emma was no where to see. He couldn't call her, the men on the other ship could hear him - and he wasn't aware if they had good intentions or not.

He also wasn't able to jump into the water. He was the captain and he must be on board when the other ship came too close. "Lieutenant Forbes, get into the water and search for Emma. Stay with her until the ship is gone or I give you a signal to come back. Stay hidden." Forbes looked at him as if he had asked him something impossible.

"Do you have a problem, Lieutenant?" Forbes shook his head although he was white like a sheet.

"Captain. I volunteer for getting the princess", Lieutenant Ivory suggested. Killian clenched his jaw. "No, my order was for Lieutenant Forbes. Back to your duty, Lieutenant." Ivory looked at him sternly but obeyed. Killian turned his attention back to the young officer. "Get undressed and hurry." Forbes nodded and stripped to his waist.

„Killian?", everyone turned seeing Emma standing there, shivering, soaked, her wet hair stuck on her face.

„Emma!", Killian ran to her and put his coat around her, „there is a ship coming closer, hide in the cabin, I will be with you as quickly as possible.

She nodded but didn't move. „Emma?! You have to go." She gave him back his coat, opened the hatch and climbed down the ladder.


	4. struggles

"NO!", she tossed the bowl through the galley. "That's not even close!" Emma was furious. She only wanted to eat Killian's Captain stew and Huffington had assured her to cook it for her. But that was a promise he regretted very quickly.

"How hard can it be to cook this stupid stew?" she yelled and watched the cook moving around.

"I... I am sorry, Captain. Captain Jones never allowed someone nearby when he cooked his stew. I really tried my best to..."

"Try harder. I'll be back in an hour. Hopefully to fill my belly with delicious stew. Otherwise I really need to think about replacing the cook."

"Captain", Huffington answered shocked, but stopped talking immediately when he saw her hard expression.

Emma left the galley and went on deck. She was starving, she was angry and she wanted nothing more than anything to remember Killian. She missed him so damn much. She missed not only himself and his presence, he missed how the crew acted around him, she missed the little things like his innuendos, his interacting with the crew, with other people. She missed his voice teaching her sailing or other stuff on board, she missed the sparkling in his eyes when he saw her interest.

She wanted him back, she needed him back. How could she survive another day without him. She had lost him once, she could remember how helpless she felt, she didn't want to accept that she lost him again – finally this time.

No. She needed to focus on something else. She yelled at her crew. Ignoring the scared looks, ignoring the whispers around her. She has changed, yes. But who could blame her? She was at open sea with her men. Men who respected her as long as she was a strong leader. But how long was it possible to keep up her mask. She did not feel like a leader or a captain. She felt like a small child again, a child who again lost everything. She knew her parents and Henry waited for her, back in their castle, but she wasn't ready to face them already. She needed to find Killian.

"Captain?" It was Mr. Haddock who stood next to her, watching her concerned.

"What?", she snapped at him without turning.

Haddock didn't back down, he was her first mate and he knew she trusted him. "Captain Swan", he said again, making her turn this time. She looked at him and waited. "Emma, I know you are grieving, but we have to look forward. We are on a mission and we need to fulfill our duty and sail back to your parents."

"It's Captain! How dare you question my decision? Killian is not dead and I won't stop looking for him" she yelled at him, darkness sparkling in her eyes.

Haddock still looked at her calm. "Emma. Maybe he is not dead, maybe he is. You know I support you, but you are treating the men like shit. Without any respect. You don't rest, you hardly eat anything, you are grumpy and yell at anyone crossing your path. We all lost our Captain, Ma'am. Please, stop acting like a bitch and start being our Captain."

Emma's jaw dropped, she was ready to yell at him, she felt the urge to raise her hand, to use her magic, but she did nothing. She only stared at him, closed her mouth again. She turned her head and saw the whole crew watching them. She knew she had to make a decision. Now.

She lost Killian. She lost Smee. She lost half of the crew. She was exhausted. She was frustrated. She was starving.

"Okay", she whispered nearly too silently.

"Aye", Haddock answered and nodded satisfied, he walked to the helm and yelled at the crew, "what are you looking at, you filthy bastards, back to your duties!"

Emma took a deep breath, she nodded at Haddock and went back to the galley. Huffington looked at her scared. "Captain...", he stuttered, "the... the stew... it takes some time to..."

She waved with her hand to silence him. "I'm here to apologize. Not to make you feel more uncomfortable."

"Captain, you don't need to apologize. I am sorry I didn't fulfill my duty to the utmost satisfaction. I tried to do three different variants now. Hopefully one of it will hit your taste?!"

"Thank you, Mr. Huffington", she turned around and faltered.

"Captain!" Huffington hurried to her but Mr. Haddock was already by her side. The cook watched the first mate eagerly.

"Bring the stew to the captain quarters as soon as it is ready", he ordered and slipped his arm around Emma's waist. She shook it off and tried to walk on her own. She didn't want to show anyone how exhausted she was, how tired and weak she felt. She leaned against the wall for a moment.

"Can I get a glass of water, please?", she asked with her eyes closed. A moment later she felt the glass touching her hand. She opened her eyes again, took it and gulped the whole glass in one go. "Thank you, Mr. Haddock, Mr. Huffington." She pushed herself off the wall and walked slowly towards her cabin. Mr. Haddock followed her.

"Emmett, why are you following me?" she suddenly asked without stopping or turning her head.

"I am concerned of you."

"Don't be. It's nothing some food and another glass of water can cure."

"You need to sleep, Emma. You need to rest. Please."

Emma suddenly stopped and turned. "Since when are you my doctor?"

"I am not. You know that. I'm your friend and I care for you. What if you break down in front of the crew? I know the men left are more than loyal but there are limits. You cannot have these kind of mood swings. One moment you yell at them and scare the shit out of them and the next moment you can hardly stand up on our own and look like a young lass who cannot handle herself let alone a whole ship. Let me help you. Let me fulfill my duty. Let everyone fulfill its duty. You can't do everything on your own."

"Howwwww...", she stumbled again, this time directly into her first mate's arms.

"Captain!", he held her and lifted her easily. He carried her to the cabin and laid her on the cod. "Rest! Find some sleep and **no** magic! I'll take care of the ship. Let go", he sat down next to her and stroked her hair, "we will find him, Emma. Don't lose hope. Sleep well."

Emma drifted off immediately. She was beyond exhausted and although she was more than hungry she fell asleep for several hours.


	5. fever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more and more men get ill on board of the Jolly Roger - what happens when Eli gets sick? Can Emma help him and the others by using her magic? We all know: all magic comes with a price

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. This is a chapter I've planned to publish some time ago but I wasn't quite happy about it and it didn't really fit into the big story. So it doesn't have any influence on the main story, nevertheless I wanted to publish it. I hope you enjoy it – I hope you like it.

 

* * *

"Another man is ill, Captain."

"Same symptoms?"

"Aye, high fever, shivers, headache, talking in his sleep, anorexia when he is awake or unconsciousness."

"How many are diseased?"

"Seven. Crew men, no superior officers."

"Eli?"

"No, the boy is fine. But that doesn't mean anything. Everyone said he felt good this morning and an hour ago Cottrall broke down."

Killian sighed and looked at the water. "Emma needs to stay in our quarters. I can't risk her getting infected. As long as we don't know what this is or what's causing it we all have to be attentive."

"Aye, Sir. Commander Haddock and Mr Baskin are in the stowage. They are checking the supplies. Will we anchor tonight?" Smee asked and shifted nervously.

"Aye. I don't want to risk anything. Has anyone checked on Densworth? I haven't seen him since yesterday."

"I will send someone" Smee said and placed his red beanie back on his head.

* * *

"Emma?! You must stay in the cabin. It isn't safe out here. I told you... are you crying?" Killian was up in a second, he rushed towards her ignoring his cards which now laid open on the barrel. He and some crew members gambled every now and then to pass some time.

Emma buried her face on his chest. "He is dead" she said quietly, she wasn't even sure Killian heard her.

"Who is dead, Emma?"

"CAPTAIN! Charlston, he is dead!" Smee yelled and ran to him, "I was woken by a loud noise. Several men were talking nervously and then I saw it... Oh." He stopped immediately when he saw Emma in Killian's arms.

She still sobbed but Killian needed to know what happened. He wrapped his arms around her while he forced his first mate to go on.

"Charlston laid on the floor, his whole body was trembling uncontrollably. He was talking nonsense, louder and louder, nearly screaming the words. His eyes were opened widely, red and afraid. A moment later everything was over. He sagged, didn't move anymore. His body was nearly boiling, covered in sweat..."

Killian closed his eyes, trying to shield Emma. "What **did** he say?"

"Captain?"

"What did Charlston talk about before he died?"

"He... he was delirious..."

"Let me decide this, Smee."

"He talked about someone or something that was about to come or happen... he talked about the princess... about the mission and you, sir", he stopped and breathed heavily, "he was afraid, he repeated himself over and over again. He said he was burning inside, he wanted it to be over, he wanted water but he didn't drink when we offered him some, it was creepy, Captain."

Killian pushed Emma off himself gently. "Love, you need to go to the cabin. I need to take care of this incident."

Emma nodded slowly, not saying anything. "I will bring you there myself. Smee, I'll meet you in a minute in the crew quarters."

Killian took Emma's hand and led her to the hatch. He opened it and climbed down a few rungs. She followed him and he held her to help her down.

"Are you all right, love?"

"Yes, but I want to come with you."

"No, Emma, you need to stay here, I don't want you to get ill too. It's risky enough that I stay with you the nights. Infections are no fun in this realm. Many people died of what is called a flu in your realm. We don't have the medicine you have, especially not on a ship."

"I know. But Killian, please be careful."

He kissed her and left the quarter again, this time he used to door. He went directly to the crew quarters. He wanted to know exactly what had happen.

* * *

The night was almost over when Killian entered his quarters. Every single crew man reported what happened. Mostly the same, some details were different. Eight people on board were still ill. Now one was dead and nobody knew what was causing it or how it could be healed.

Killian stripped and joined Emma on the cod. She laid her head on his chest but didn't wake. He started to comb through her hair. He was afraid. Afraid of not knowing what was going on, afraid of not knowing how to help his men and afraid that Emma will get ill too. He fell asleep suddenly, his fingers still in Emma's hair.

When he woke up again, he was alone in bed. The sun was shining bright into the cabin. He stretched and yawned not willing to get up.

Suddenly someone knocked on the door. "Captain! We have a problem. Are you awake?"

"In a minute, Smee", Killian hopped off the cod and got dressed, when he opened the door his first mate looked at him nervously. "More men diseased?"

"It's the boy."

Killian closed his eyes. "Where is Emma?"

"When she heard it, she went to him. We couldn't stop her. She is still with him. But Captain, things look black. He is burning up, talking nonsense. Emma is trying to lower his temperature by making leg compresses but I don't think that will help."

"Thank you, Smee. Who is in charge of the vessel?"

"Commander Haddock, Sir. He and Baskin checked every supply yesterday, but they didn't find anything rotten or expired. They cleaned the stowage too. We tried to find out if the affected crew members have anything in common like what they ate, what they did, where they went. But no clues so far."

"Thank you, Smee", Killian wanted to pass him but his first mate stopped him nervously. "Aye?" Killian asked and looked at him sternly.

"It... ahm... it's probably nothing."

"If something is nothing or not can only be judged after it is said out loud."

"The princess... she..."

"Bloody hell, Smee, what about her?"

"She was **there** yesterday. When Charlston died."

"What? Why did no one mention that?"

"Everyone was too afraid?!"

"Of what? Me?"

"No... **her**!"

Killian frowned. That didn't make any sense. "What do you want to tell me?"

"Captain, I..."

Suddenly a bloodcurdling scream filled the whole lower deck. Killian and Smee exchanged glances and started running. When they entered the crew quarters they stopped immediately.

Emma stood next to Eli's hammock - the boy was screaming and Emma was talking to him or herself or nobody at all, Killian couldn't tell. Her glance was dull, far away and worried.

"Love?" Killian asked carefully, he stepped closer, but stopped when Emma looked at him.

"I can't let him die" she said quietly – nearly whispered.

"What are you doing, Emma?"

"I need to save him" she answered mechanically.

"Emma? Love?"

"He is dying, I can't let him die. I need to save him. I need to heal him. I won't let him die."

Killian barked at his crew to get back. He wanted to give Emma space, but he also wanted to protect his crew.

Smee looked at him worried, afraid and irritated.

"Emma. You know that you can't save everyone. All magic comes with a price!" Killian started again, his eyes fixated on her.

When Emma answered, her voice was raspy, dark and hardly recognisable. "I have to save him. I brought him here. I can't allow that he dies."

"Love, it's okay. Let go. Don't you see, Eli is in pain."

Emma looked at him sternly, her eyes were red and puffy, dark and angry. She shouted at him.

"Because of **me**. It's all **my** fault. **STAY AWAY FROM ME**."

Killian had to cover his eyes as Emma's outburst created a huge bubble of light which flashed trough the room.

He heard Eli scream, heard the nervous murmurs of his crew members and suddenly the light expired and a noise of a body hitting the floor filled to room.

Killian and the crew still covered their eyes when they suddenly heard some nervous, confused voices.

"Captain?" "What happened?" "Eli?" "Where am I?" "You look great, man." "You all right?" "Fendrik!" "How is that possible?"

Smee, Killian and the others looked up and saw eight men, including Eli, standing in the middle of the crew quarters, talking irritated and looking shocked but not a bit ill at all.

Finally one of the naval officers named Cottrall looked at Killian irritated. "Captain Jones? What happened? Did... did you find a cure? How is it possible that we are all recovered at the same time?"

Killian wanted to answer (although he had no real answers) when Eli suddenly cried out loud. Everyone turned around and saw that the boy was sitting on the floor next to someone.

"Bloody hell, Emma!" Killian yelled and ran to her. He shoved Eli aside and knelt next to Emma's body. "Emma? Emma! Love, wake up!"

He touched her forehead which was covered with sweat. "Bloody hell, she is burning up."

He picked her up slowly. She was unconscious, her whole body heavy; arms and legs dangling lifeless. Killian was more than worried but he didn't want to show his concerns in front of his crew.

He carried her to his cabin, every crew member he passed looked at them bewildered. Even Densworth didn't ask a single question when Killian passed him. The whole ship seemed to be buzzing, nearly glowing.

The sailors who were with Killian under deck before, tried to put together what had happen in front of their eyes. They talked with the recovered ones, set up theories, whispered with each other and avoided Smee's stern glances.

The sailors above deck had no clue what was going on at all. They only saw a light breaking through every crack of the ship, shining so bright they had to cover their eyes. But it was over within seconds. Haddock's loud voice echoing through the outbreaking turmoil. The men obeyed and went back to their duties immediately.

Haddock was concerned, he had heard screams below deck, he had heard the captain's voice, talking about Emma. He wanted to know what was going on down there, but he also knew he couldn't leave the deck right know. He had to wait for anyone coming up and talking to him.

* * *

„Emma?" Killian wiped a wet cloth over her forehead, she didn't move, didn't respond. Killian sighed and shook her gently. _She is breathing_ , he calmed himself and laid a hand on her chest. Emma laid perfectly still, only breathing in and out, her face blank, white like a sheet.

Three days she didn't wake. Three days Killian stayed with her day and night. Everyone one board was confused about the latest events but no one had the courage to talk about it.

The seven healed crew men were grateful for their cure, only Eli felt miserable. He felt responsible, he felt alone and he was afraid of losing Emma.

Commander Haddock was the only one besides Killian and Smee who was allowed to be near Emma, he was the one who was with her when Killian slept or when he had to be on deck or somewhere else.

He sat at Killian's desk when suddenly he saw Emma move slightly. He rushed towards her and knelt next to the cod.

"Emma? Mistress?" He wanted to touch her but before his hand could touch her head he stopped himself.

"Killian?" Emma said with a weak voice. Commander Haddock wanted to get up to get Killian but suddenly Emma's hand found his.

He swallowed thickly not sure what to do now. He slowly placed his other hand on Emma's, stroking the back of her hand in a caring way.

"Killian" she whispered again.

Commander Haddock sighed. "No, Emma, it's me, Emmett - eh, Commander Haddock." He gulped again, staring at his captain's girlfriend.

She was a lovely and beautiful woman. He studied her soft features, her bright green eyes covered with her eyelids. Her soft pink lips closed, formed into a smile.

Emmett was still stroking her hand but felt the urge to touch her. He pulled his hand free and reached across the cod to put some loose strands out of Emma's face. He traced her forehead, her cheek, her jaw with his fingertips, started to caress her cheek with his knuckles.

"Killian" Emma whispered again making Commander Haddock flinch. He pulled back his hand and opened his mouth when he heard someone behind him. He slowly turned his head, looking at Killian directly.

"Captain! Emma... she..." he cleared his throat and got up. "I think she is waking up. She called after you. I... I just wanted to get you but... I didn't want to leave her alone..."

"Thank you Commander" Killian said walking to Emma slowly. He sat down next to her and took her hand. "Is there something else?"

Haddock shook his head walking towards the door. He was unsure what Killian saw eventually, was unsure about what happened a few minutes ago. He shook his head walking back to his duty on deck.

Killian watched the door close and turned his attention towards Emma the moment his second mate was gone. "Emma? Love?"

"Killian? Killian what happened?" Emma asked weakly, opening her eyes slowly. He looked at her concerned not sure what to tell her, not sure himself what happened.


	6. Jonahberries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma got some Jonahberries which cause interesting side effects.
> 
> Mention of drug abuse and angst

"Killian THESE are the most delicious raspberries I've ever tasted." Emma smiled at him, popping another sweet berry into her mouth. 

Her hair danced in the wind on High Sea, her skirts flowing around her slim waist.

"Raspberries? Love, it's not the time for raspberries and it's not like in your realm that you get fruits and vegetables every season of the year." Killian furrowed his brows, he was at the helm, looking at his fiancé irritated.

Emma smiled at him, munching another raspberry. "I don't know where your men got these but as I said before, these are delicious." She came closer, putting her arms around Killian's neck. "But I also get hungry for something else."

Killian raised an eyebrow even higher. "Love, show me the berries."

"Noooooo," Emma suddenly pouted. "You don't get my berry berries. Emma only!" She broke the hug, pressing the bowl of berries to her chest.

"Emma?" Killian wondered, reaching out towards her. Suddenly Emma squealed, pressing the bowl even further into herself, dashing off towards the stairs.

"Emma!"

"You don't get me and my berries! Don't you try, Captain." She chirped with a childish sing-sang voice.

Killian shook his head irritated, walking towards her. She waited a bit, eying him cautiously before she ran off again, giggling and laughing.

Killian followed her, still irritated of her actual behaviour. "Emma? Where are you, love?"

Emma giggled, she was hiding under the stairs, hidden in the shadows. She ate another berry, placing her hand over her mouth, trying to stifle her laughter. She heard Killian's voice, saw his boots stepping down the stairs.

When he finally reached the bottom of the stairs, Emma couldn't hold back any longer. She dashed out of her stash and tried to run away but Killian was quicker this time. He grabbed her by her waist, put his arms around her middle, pulling her up so her legs were off the ground.

"Nooooo, you got me - that wasn't fair. You don't get my berries. Where are my yummy yummy berries?"

Emma threw her head back looking around searching for the bowl. In the heat of the moment it has landed on the floor, all berries laid around it. Killian put her down again and knelt next to her to pick up one when Emma suddenly pushed him away, collecting all the red little fruits, stuffing a whole hand full into her mouth, trying to get away again.

"Emma! Emma, love, please stop eating these berries. They are no raspberries. They are..."

"Liar... you wanna take them and eat them yourself - bad form stealing from a Princess."

Killian had to suppress a smile. When the only side effects were having a little spoiled princess for the next few hours than he would gladly accept that. But he expected more to come. As if by command, Emma shoved him aside, pulling his sword in a smooth motion before she was standing in front of him, the tip of his sword dangerously near his nose.

"You are not allowed to laugh at me, you filthy pirate. I am not afraid of you - now give me the berry in your hand or you will lose the second of yours too."

Killian looked up at her but could only see a deadly serious look. He opened his hand offering her the fruit which she hastily stuffed into her mouth. "Good boy. Now I wanna explore the ship."

Emma let go of the sword which fell to the ground with a loud shatter. She dashed off again, leaving a stunned Killian behind. He needed to find the one who gave her the berries. He needed to find out how many she ate and he needed to find her or at least someone who could look after her.

The last thing he wanted was someone getting hurt or his precious fiancé going over board because of her actual state.

"SMEE! HADDOCK! BASKIN! HUFFINGTON!" He yelled while walking back on deck. His first mate was the first with him followed by the cook and Commander Haddock. A few moments later Mr. Baskin joined the men. "Who gave Emma Jonahberries?"

"Jonahberries? On board the Jolly Roger? Every single sailer knows they are forbidden - every hallucinogen is."

"Thank you, Mr. Baskin. I know the rules as I made them but - bloody hell, Emma!"

The men turned their head looking in the same direction as their Captain. Emma was standing on the railing, dancing around fearless. She looked at Killian smiling.

"You wanna join me here, Captain? It's fun, you know - something you seem to hardly experience - or are you afraid?" She walked further, suddenly stumbling making the four men holding their breaths. Killian hastily ran towards her, passing several men who watched the whole scenario.

More and more men approached the deck, they whispered to each other, pointed at Emma and laughed and smiled. Killian looked at Huffington and Baskin. They understood and started to usher the crew men away.

"Emma, love - come down please. You could hurt yourself."

"Hmm... I could come down... OR my handsome fearless pirate, YOU could join me up here."

Kilian gulped, looking over his crew. His anger increased when he saw the amused faces of his crew members. He turned towards Emma who was still balancing on the railing before he turned his attention towards his crew.

"Who gave her the berries? If I find out who is responsible for this mess I will make him clean the ship from the stowage to the tip of the mast." He got furious, eyeing his men angrily. "Emma wasn't raised in this realm. She never heard of Jonahberries before - she never tried a single one before. That's not a childish prank - that's something serious. I am..."

"Uh hu look at the Captain he is getting mad at his men - that's hot, Mr. Hook." Emma's voice broke through the night making Killian turn his head slowly. Suddenly Emma slipped and fell on the floor. "Fuck," she admitted getting back on her feet. She stumbled again, trying to find leverage. "Woah, what's happening now? Everything is spinning… that's awesome." She slowly turned around, staring at the stars, raising her hands above. "Killian that's awesome - I want more berries - it shall never end. Give me more!"

Killian stepped closer, trying to stop her motion. "Love, calm down. Stop. Emma! STOP!"

Emma obeyed, eyeing him a bit frightened. He placed his hand and hook on her upper arms, looking at her sternly. "Emma you ate some hallucinogenic berries. You are suffering from the side effects. Everything will be alright once you get them out of your system."

Emma shifted out off his hold. "But I don't want it to end. It's "bloody fantastic"." She imitated him and giggled, running towards his men who were still staring at her.

Some looked frightened, some amused, but all were very interested in what was going on.

"Emma," Mr. Baskin suddenly stepped into her way, "please listen to the Captain. You could hurt yourself, you could hurt anyone on board."

"Uh and we don't want the naughty princess with her magic hurt anyone, do we?" To give her words extra credit she created a fireball in her hands like Regina always did.

„EMMA!“ She turned around seeing Killian’s angry expression, he stared at her, not moving. His coat floated in the wind which had sped up the last minutes. His hair was disheveled as usual but the wind giving it the final bit of perfection.

The fire in Emma's hand vanished, she dropped her arms defeated. Seeing him looking at her that angrily broke her heart. Without a warning she collapsed and started to sob heavily. "I am sorry, I am so sorry. I never wanted to be a bad girl. Do I have to be punished now? Will you throw me over board?"

She didn't look up, she was too afraid of looking into his eyes. Killian on the other hand was taken aback by her reaction. As quick as his feet took him he stood next to her, bending down to help her up. She found his eyes, fear written all over her face. "Please don't hurt me," she whispered afraid, looking down again.

Killian felt helpless. He looked around finding Commander Haddock staring at Emma with a mixture of sadness and loving care. He touched Emma's face but she flinched, her sobs getting even heavier. Killian got back on his feet, beckoning over his second mate. He whispered something to him before he turned to his men.

"Back off you filthy rats. I swear to god who ever drugged her will be punished. This is the last chance to get a harmless punishment. Scrubbing the floor will be the best you get. Aren't you man enough to step up for your errors? What a poor crew I got. I've never expected sailing with such rotten bastards. Back to your duties you maggots."

He raised his arms ushering his crew men away. He was sick of seeing them. He was hurt of Emma's reaction. He was angry at the person who turned his beloved fiancé into this mess.

Commander Haddock put both his arms around Emma, holding her tight. "Sh-sh Emma, everything is alright. Nobody wants to harm you. The Captain loves you, Princess. Don't be afraid."

She looked up at him in disbelieve. When she turned her head she was surprised to see a wrecked Killian leaning against the railing. She felt bad for him but was still too afraid to go to him. "Can you bring me to my cabin? Will you stay with me?" Her voice was weak and small.

"Aye," Emmett answered, helping her up. She leaned against him, hugging him tight. He placed on arm around her waist, holding her up.

They walked a few steps before Emma pushed the Commander away. "I am going to be sick," she suddenly yelled and ran to the railing emptying the content of her stomach over board.

Emmett looked at Killian who was watching her concerned. Emmett slowly walked to Emma who was still leaning over the railing. He placed a hand on her back, rubbing soothing circles on it. "Are you okay, Emma?"

She shook her head, slumping down on the floor. "I want my mommy and my daddy. I am all alone. I wanna go home, be in my bed. I feel awful."

Emmett brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "You are not alone. The Captain is here, Smee, Mr. Baskin and Mr. Huffington, the rest of the crew and I."

Emma smiled a weak smile before she hastily got up again, puking again over board. "I go and get the Captain, shall I?"

Emma nodded but didn't look up. She felt horrible. Her stomach rebelled against the berries she ate, her head was still spinning and she suddenly felt dizzy. She turned her head looking at Emmett and Killian who stood at the helm talking.

Without thinking she sat down on a barrel to rest and listened. She heard something next to her in the water. She felt a strange buzz in her stomach to lean over the railing to find the source. With her hands flat on the railing she pushed her a bit off to get a better look.

It seemed as if the water was endless deep. The black of the night mirrored in the water beneath her. The lights from the ship barely illuminated the surface but suddenly she saw it. A huge creature breaking threw the surface.

A loud shriek escaped her mouth before she lost her grip and fell forward. Emma closed her eyes, fear overtaking all her senses. She wished she were back in Killian's arms. She wished this nightmare would end. She was falling, the black water and the creature coming closer and closer. Emma still didn't allow herself to open her eyes.

All of a sudden she impacted on something hard, she waited for the wet and cold intruding her system, covering her body but it never came. She slowly opened her eyes looking into two ocean blue eyes full of concern and love and suddenly relief and happiness.

"Killian," Emma whispered trying to sit up. Killian pushed her down again.

"Easy, love. You fainted and fell off the barrel. You may hit your head, I don't..."

"Killian!" Emma said again, throwing her hands around his neck, not listening to his words. He held her close, cradled the back of her head.

"I am here, love, everything is alright. I am here but we should go down to our cabin. I think our bed will be more comfortable than this hard floor."

Emma nodded, not breaking her hug. She buried her head in the crook of his neck. "I love you, Killian. I am so sorry. I don't know what happened, I just..."

"It's okay, sweetheart, everything is okay. You were drugged. You ate berries which are used here in this realm to get high. Normally you eat two or three just to get a bit lightheaded but you my love ate more than twenty berries. You... you could have easily died of it. I am glad you are okay."

"Oh my goooood," Emma sighed, putting her face in her hand. She tried to think straight but the only thing she truly wanted was to go to bed and sleep. "Oh god, I am going to be sick again!"

We jumped up, swaying a bit but she was able to hold herself upright. Killian approached her side, rubbing soothing circles on her back while she spilled the content of her stomach into the black water.

When she was finished she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and turned to Killian exhausted. "Sorry," she mumbled and stumbled into his arms, "I am so tired, Killian."

"Sleep my love, I am with you, I will stay with you the whole night. You are safe now." He scooped her up into his arms, walking her down to the Captain's quarters. Everyone they passed looked at her concerned. He swore to find the bastard who drugged her. He swore he won't ever let something like that happen again.

The rest of the night he watched Emma sleeping, puking or talking in her sleep. Some of her words broke his heart. It were words of a little girl who was too afraid being sick and being a burden to anyone. It were words of a lonely lost girl.


End file.
